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Things I did today:
Meditation – No.
Pages – No.
Inward Speaking – Inadvertant, but mostly no.
Walking – Does up and down the stairs count?
Water – Try coffee.
Divination -Nope.

Notes:
Oh, ye gods, I am failing. See that list up there? The one that’s a proclamation of me doing absolutely nothing that I should have? That’s the same for the past like three days. Is it ironic or merely sad that the “holidays” have an adverse affect on my spiritual practice?

Well, what have I been doing? Lots of nothing. Playing with my iTouch. Listening to the wonderful Druidcast – I guess that fits in as something good. Trying to set up my various webnesses with little complete success. I did have the wonderful idea of writing different themed topics for certain days of the week on my personal blog, but that’s wanting to fall through as well… the last two themed days (Wednesday and Friday) have both gone by with not a pip from my end. I’m thinking, should I get rid of a few days? Or what? Ahhhh.

I am noticing a slight trend, perhaps – I seem to fall through on these things when it’s what I call “the bleeding time” – ladies might understand what I mean. I just get really bored, lethargic, I don’t want to do anything at all but sleep all day. And sleep all day I have been – yesterday I slept until 2 in the afternoon! And today was not much better, with me getting up around 11 AM.

And I’d really like to finish moving my room as I’d like it, but I’ve not the will to actually make it happen.

On top of all of that, I’ve got some thinking to do on website “issues”. I don’t actually have any pressing issues with my current host or anything like that, more just things that I’d like or things I don’t like anymore.
For one, I don’t like my domain name anymore. I created it when I was seriously becoming interested in chaos magic – and I’m not anymore. I’ve “grown away” from that path, which makes sense when I stop and consider my situation now as compared to then. I guess I’m sort of “settling down,” at the very least mentally, and chaos no longer appeals to me. However – I have not a farking clue what to go by instead. (Half-joke:) Perhaps I should do one of those “pagan name” meditations to find a new domain handle? Haha.
For another, I’m rethinking my choice of webhost. The host I’m with now is fairly good, but to be honest I don’t really need all the space and features I’m paying for, and I would love to not pay as much anymore. This is probably more of an “issue” with my current hosting package rather than my current hosting provider, but shopping around is a good thing, isn’t it?

Eh. I have no idea. I think I’ll put on some jeans and move some shit around and wait for John to get done with his cousin’s siding.

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2 Comments

  1. I think everyone is struggling a bit, don’t set such higher goals. I wasn’t able to keep up my daily tarot draw so I cuted back to once a week. As for the name thing it sure beats all the usual names moonbeam, moonchild and so on 😉

    • Yeah. I think I’m cutting the “morning” pages down to weekdays only (because that’s how it’s been going anyway), but I would very much like to do more meditative, “in my head” kind of stuff.

      The name is good, it’s just no longer what I’m looking for or representing. Similar to how Feith felt a change of name was in order for her when she ended the Dark Side of Fey.
      I’ll still go by CrimsonSheep, though probably shortened as I and others do to just Crimson, it’s just the “chaos” thing that I feel I no longer need. This may also have something to do with me feeling more comfortable with going by my “real” name online, since I’m now legally an adult…which also happens to coincide with Feith doing the same… That might be something for me to look into…


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